Hello, and welcome to All Your Monies, where The Glorio Blog’s resident toy and figure collecting crew (and Aquagaze) will run down the last week’s new preorders, turning a loving or scathing eye over what’s been put out for you to spend your hard earned cash on. This week, untold horror is waiting for you at the end

Black Hanekawa (Bakemonogatari)
Alter, August, 7000JPY (Re-release)

Zigg: Typical Alter- that is to say grandstanding pose, clever base, beautiful paint and an unparalleled level of care. I really like the sense of movement you get from this one and the hair is simply magnificent. Glad to see it again.

Aqua: Have Alter ever made a bad figure? A sweet, cleverly designed base, a dynamic and playful pose and that sweet eye for detail typical of the company, this is yet another figure I can wholeheartedly recommend. For being based on an admittedly pretty skeevy franchise like Bakemonogatari, this figure manages to keep things relatively PG-rated, although I have yet to figure out the strange law of physics that makes clothes hang from breasts like that without falling off. If I can have one complaint, it is that the face is a bit tame in comparison to the seductive playfulness of the overall figure.

Lifesong: This is a well timed re-release. The most recent monogatari work wonders for Hanakawa’s character and this has become a more iconic piece for the series because of that I think. The energy in this pose is incredible. The pajama top lazily hanging off her shoulder and the expression on her face and in her body posture are spot on for the character. If you are looking for a piece of monogatari to put on display, you really can’t go wrong here.

Jel: It’s a tough call between this or Kotobukiya’s version, but in the end I have to give the edge to Alter. I’ll take the better figure sculpt over the cooler base. Not only is the sculpt awesome but that pose is amazing. So much energy, movement, and playful menace in this figure, it’s a great representation of the character. I do wish there was a little more detail on her hair, but other than this is a great re-release if you missed her the first time around.

Timmy: I was tempted by this the first time around and it seems Alter wishes to tempt me again. Hanekawa looks lovely and she has a great base to go along with her.

Tsukiko Tsutsukakushi (The Hentai Prince and the Stony Cat)
Kotobukiya, September, 5480JPY

Zigg: It’s an interesting looking figure and there’s a lot of lovely detailing here – the cat shadow for example, or the apple on her head which attaches magnetically. Still, this one is just too questionable for me to like much. What’s with the ridiculously cut shirt, or the flipped skirt? And you couldn’t realy get much more unsubtle than having a bunch of cherries in your mouth. ugh.

Aqua: I wanted to talk about the figure, but then I got distracted by that name. Seriously? Tsukiko Tsutsukakushi? Try saying that out loud without biting your tongue. Or vomiting. I don’t know whether that is brilliant wordplay or just plain frustrating. Anyways, this is a pretty neatly designed little figure here, although the thing that makes it so special, the shadow, looks a bit odd. Wouldn’t that have worked way better as a two-dimensional image? By the way, I’m pretty sure no high school in Japan has uniforms with a shirt that bares one’s midriff, and that tail’s just there for maximum panty exposure. Then again, I didn’t really expect anything less from a show named “The Hentai Prince of Bel-Air and the Stony Cat”.

Lifesong: I love iconic figures like this one. Judging from the first episode of the anime, this expression is spot on. The cats are an obvious tie in with the name and the fruit… well that should be obvious enough as well. My one concern is that the camera angels are not being entirely honest with us. I imagine that every angle we haven’t seen in promo photos involve a panty shot. Despite my concern I ordered her. If anyone reading is on the fence, I suggest you make up your mind fast, she has already begun popping in and out of stock at amiami.

Jel: A lot of interesting details going on here, the most obvious being the cat shadow on the base. It certainly is unique,  I’m not sure if I like it from all angles but it does create a neat optical illusion from the front. I also appreciate the super detailed apple and cute kitty looking… up her skirt? Pretty cute overall I suppose but I’m a little hung up on the fact she looks suuuuuper young and the flipped skirt and cherries in her mouth make things pretty awkward.

Timmy: Tsukiko has been on my radar for a while now and for good reason. I love all the small details about this figure, ranging from the base with its cat, shadow cat, and paw prints, all the way up to her cute expression and the removable apple. The only issue is as Life said, the camera is lying on this one and its going to be really hard not to see her underwear.

Gumi (Virtual Vocalist)
Aquamarine, September, 8600JPY

Zigg: Gumi has a cool looking design and this figure does a great job of capturing that, but I can’t shake the feeling this is a 5000 yen figure with ideas above its station. Detailing is decent but there’s none of the design flair I’d expect in a figure priced at this level. This is also a object lesson in why you do not shoot lightly coloured figures against pure white backgrounds.

Aqua: No, no, you silly, Gumi’s not a Vocaloid! She’s a Virtual Vocalist, totally different! If she wants to be the new Miku, she’s gonna have to stroll by her local character designer first, though. With the green hair and the cutesy outfit, she looks just a tad bit too much like Ranka Lee. By the way, you’ll never guess who provides the voice for Gumi! Gripes with the character aside, I’d advise her to get some decent figures as well. While this is by no means a bad figure, the pose is as generic as they come and the price is too damn high. Not the next big thing, just the Cody Simpson to Miku’s Justin Bieber.

*hides for a mob of angry Miku fans*

Lifesong: Gumi is looking pretty cool here, but her price is a bit high considering the static pose. I do worry about her skin color being yellow. Her abbs in particular look kind of gross. Maybe the painter was going for sweaty look? I hope the final product won’t have this skin color issue.

Jel: Gumi seems to be gunning for Miku’s throne these days, and while she might not have the same recognition as the world’s most popular virtural diva I’m not going to be surprised if more figures of her start popping up. This is a really nice rendition of her with meticulously sculpted hair and other fine details like the frills under her skirt. Overall though, it just feels a little… uninspired, especially for the price tag. I would have liked to have seen a more vibrant pose or a crazy carrot base or something. So unless you’re a diehard Gumi fan, might be best to save your cash and see if something better priced comes along.

Timmy: Gumi is looking pretty sharp here, and while there is a lot to love about her the colorful paint scheme is by far my favorite. She feels a tad bit expensive though.

Figma Kyouko Sakura Casual ver. (Puella Magi Madoka Magica)
Max Factory, August, 3030JPY

Zigg: Kyouko has the advantage of not having to adopt a school uniform, so this figma stands out nicely in the second wave of Madoka figmas. I really like the sculpting on her hoody and he chunky boots, but I’m a little disappointed Max Factory had to resort to breaking up her shorts with joints – we saw a few weeks ago with figma Akane Isshiki that it’s possible to avoid this. The bundles of food are a nice bonus though. Strong figma overall.

Aqua: Magical girls always sell, and Max factory knows. Madoka is slowly becoming All Your Monies’ new Nanoha, yet I have no problem with that because Madoka is actually a good show. Despite this, the civilian figmas that have been released up to now have been wholly uninpressive, due to the lot of them pretty much being the same figure with a different head. Kyouko’s a nice change of pace, coming in with a memorable design, a bunch of snacks and a thoroughly welcoming price. If you love the redhead rogue, get her while she’s hot.

Lifesong: I like Kyouko more than the rest of the casuals. Her outfit has personality the others lack. I am looking forward to getting this one and finally finishing this set.

Jel: Kyouko is the best of Madoka’s second line of figmas by default since she’s too cool for school. Who wants to wear a boring uniform when you can run around town in a blue hoodie and cutoffs? I also love that she comes with an appropriate amount of snacks, especially since it seems Max Factory has been skimping on figma accessories these days. Pretty much a must have for Kyouko fans, but as with any of the Madoka figmas beware – you can’t buy just one.

Timmy: Kyouko! Oh how I have waited for you. Some great faces and a lot of great food make this fiery redhead impossible to miss.

Kirino Kousaka Lying Pose Ver (My Little Sister Can’t Be This Ugh!)
cLayz, July, 10,050JPY

Zigg: You can’t spell cLayz without LAZY. You can spell it without shitty though, and that’s what this thing is.

Aqua: This figure is so, so wrong, mocking it is just too easy. It’s pretty damn hard to talk about anything related to Kirino without adressing the fact that she is a horrible, selfish twat who only serves as a wish fulfilment device for masochistic manchildren and about the closest a canon character has ever come to being a Mary Sue, but nevertheless, I will try to- Oh. Shit. Anyways, this figure is expensive as sin and while I appreciate trying to do something different, that face proves that CLayz’s quality control is comprised of various farm animals. Now excuse me, I’m going to consult my psychiatrist over my little pediophobia problem.

Lifesong: That face… I am no Kirino fan, but this just isn’t her. This thing looks more like an evil monster than a cute anime girl. Kill it with fire and cover the ashes with holy water to be safe.

Jel: That’s it, shut down the blog, we’re done here…. How did this abomination get approved for sale??? With that grotesque face, I can’t even imagine the most diehard Kirino fan wanting this. I’m going to just try and scrub this from my brain and hope it doesn’t haunt my nightmares, but I’m not getting my hopes up on that.

Timmy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! Also this is Clayz so it will probably come out looking like shit. Double AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! And that’s before I even bother to look at the price.