GLORIO Fall 2015 Anime Guide Part 2

2015 Fall_2

Like the changing of the leaves the Fall anime season brings a change in source materials, with the latest crop of shows full of light novel adaptations and anime originals. In grand Glorio Blog tradition, I’m in charge of the second part, which features the anticipated One Punch Man, the not-so-glorious return of Glorio Blog dark horse Garo and noitaminA’s umpteenth attempt at winning back people with actual standards. Furthermore, there’s girls being flirty with girls, guys being flirty with guys, girls being flirty with a guy with no personality and a guy pretending he flirts with guys because he’s not allowed to flirt with girls. Anime sure is the best, isn’t it?

If you missed Part 1 of the guide you can check it out here.

One Punch Man

Manga Adaptation by Madhouse Studios
Air Date: 10/5/2015
One of the most toxic popular tropes in recent anime has to be the invincible hero. Anime protagonists nowadays obliterate their enemies by pulling random abilities out of their behinds, completely destroying any tension or risk in the action for the sake of providing the oh-so-fragile straight nerd audience a cheap power fantasy. About damn time for a good old parody, I say, so thank divinity for One Punch Man, the shounen hero who is so overpowered it bores him. The webcomic-turned-into-proper-manga by Yusuke Murata of Eyeshield 21 fame is known for action sequences so dynamic you can make GIFs out of them, so Madhouse had better bring their a-game. Shingo Natsume (Space Dandy) is the man in charge and Jam Project are doing the OP, so hype is not unwarranted.

Yuru Yuri San☆Hai!

Yuru Yuri I’m Only Copying and Pasting That Star Once, Yuru Yuri: Dogakobo is Dead

Manga Adaptation by TYO Animations
Air Date: 10/6/2015
The first season of Yuru Yuri was an enjoyable little show that laid the groundwork for the type of colourful, hyperactive comedies Dogakobo would later become known for, though like many shows of its ilk, it long overstayed its welcome. Season 2 mostly rethreaded old ground and never really moved past the gratuitous boatloads of ship tease it became pretty much infamous for. More Yuru than Yuri, in other words, though TYO Animations must have looked at the recent resurrection of Working!! and concluded that there’s still money to be milked from bringing a beaten-into-the-ground slice-of-life comedy back to life. The original cast returns, but the original staff doesn’t, so my hopes for Yuru Yuri Shangai! to bring forth the lesbiapocalypse are close to zero. Also, they’re all, like, thirteen.

High School Star Musical

Star Mu, Koukou Hoshi Kageki

Anime Original by C-Station
Air Date: 10/6/2015
Would you believe me if I told you there actually is a manga adaptation of High School Musical? Sadly enough, the pretty boys of Star Mu don’t look like they’re gonna bust out into song at the drop of a hat, as the trailer seemed surprisingly lacking in the singing, dancing and getting fired for looking at people of the opposite sex department. Whatever Star Mu is, it’s definitely one for the lad-loving ladies out there, though. I, for one, welcome this recent influx of lady-catering, but that doesn’t change the fact that this show looks like it will put you to sleep quicker than a tape with whale noises.

Dance With Devils

Anime Original by Brains Base
Air Date: 10/7/2015
Even the most reprehensible crap will have its defense squads, we at the Glorio Blog hilariously found out when we announced the birth of this very website with a classy jab at fans of Ro-Kyu-Bu! So yeah, how disturbing it might seem to us, turns out there actually are women who are way into shoujo anime that make Fifty Shades of Gray look like a Take Back The Night PSA. Admittedly, those people know how to safely indulge in fantasies better than we do, but that doesn’t mean we can’t feel grossed out by watching a rosy-cheeked ingenue get repeatedly assaulted by a squad of devilishly handsome devils with poor understanding of how consent works. Wait, we are talking about that second season of Diabolik Lovers here, right? I could’ve sworn we were.

Syomin Sample

Ore ga Ojou-sama Gakkou ni “Shomin Sample” Toshite Gets-Sareta Ken, The Story in Which I Was Kidnapped by a Young Lady’s School to be a “Sample of the Common People”

Light Novel Adaptation by Silver Link
Air Date: 10/7/2015
Do you think pure, innocent girls who have never seen a man in their entire lives are desirable? Is ‘dude has to pretend he’s gay so girls won’t think he wants to ravish them’ your idea of brilliant comedy? Just follow these easy steps to live a fulfilling life!

  1. Watch this show.
  2. Never visit this website again.
  3. Unplug your modem.
  4. Go to NASA and volunteer to be the first human to set foot on Pluto.

A Corpse Is Buried Under Sakurako’s Feet

Sakurako-san no Ashimoto ni wa Shitai ga Umatteiru, Someone Please Give This a Better Title

Light Novel Adaptation by TROYCA
Air Date: 10/8/2015
Sakurako is the odd duck that comes out once in a while to try and convince you that not all light novels are about milquetoast protagonists and their mysterious girlfriends, which it does by being about… a milquetoast protagonist and his mysterious girlfriend. Doesn’t sound particularly exciting, until you find out the adaptation is in the hands of Takayo Ikami, writer of Penguindrum and Yurikuma Arashi. With a bit of luck, this wil actually be that second coming of Hyouka KyoAni stil owes us. At the very least it already looks the part.

Anti-Magic Academy: The 35th Test Platoon

Taimadou Gakuen 35 Shiken Shoutai

Light Novel Adaptation by Silver Link
Air Date: 10/8/2015
Stop me if you’ve heard this one before. Dude goes to magic soldier school. Dude sucks at being a soldier. Dude gets demoted to loser squad filled with hot girls who all want to jump his generic bones. Dude turns out to be better than everyone else after all. Dude uses swords because the guns everyone else uses are dumb. Dude gets silly nickname and has to fight the [pretentious proper noun] with his magical [other pretentious proper noun] powers. Dude finds out he is actually [nonsensical proper noun], the last of the [ridiculous proper noun that every sub group translating this garbage will translate differently] destined to save the world and be involved in a love dodecahedron that lasts 12 volumes until he sort-of-but-not-really hooks up with the first girl he met. You know, the one that everyone hates.

Everything Becomes F: The Perfect Insider

Subete ga F ni Naru: The Perfect Insider

Light Novel Adaptation by A-1 Pictures
Air Date: 10/9/2015
The noitaminA brand doesn’t mean anything anymore. Fuji TV know this, but occasionally they do like to pretend they still care about the anyone-but-the-average-otaku audience the timeslot initially targeted. Enter The Perfect Insider, an adaptation of an Actual Proper Novel™ with character designs by Inio Asano, the subversive mastermind behind Solanin, Goodnight Punpun and Dead Dead Demons De-De-De-De-Destruction. While staff’s expertise is a bit questionable (Elfen Lied?), the original novel was kind of a big deal — even featuring in the top 100 best Japanese mystery novels of all time, compiled by fancy-pants magazine Bungeishunju — so it wouldn’t hurt to give this one a go.

Garo: The Crimson Moon

Garo: Guren no Tsuki

Anime Original by MAPPA
Air Date: 10/10/2015
You might remember Garo (pronounced “GAAAAAAH-ROOOOOOOOOOO!”) as that show about a kid with silly hair who slept with a woman twice his age and then helped the ghost of his mum drag an evil priest into hell for all of eternity. It was pretty rad and not freudian at all. For its second season, the toku-turned-anime trades in medieval Europe for the rarely represented Heian period, an era in Japanese history when imperial power and Chinese influences were at their height. Sadly enough, in its desire to be as different from the first season it can possibly be, Crimson Moon has tossed out pretty much every guarantee it will be just as good. Yasuko Kobayashi is out, for one, as someone thought it was a good idea to replace her with the dynamic duo of Shou Aikawa and… *eerie violins, mass hysteria, collective evacuations” Toshiki Inoue, the lunatic behind such ‘hits’ as Shougeki Gouraigan and that bit of Movie Wars Core that didn’t have the Chief in it. Run, hide, weep, give in to eternal despair, and may the promise of another Jam Project theme song guide us through these dark times.

Valkyrie Drive Mermaid

Anime Original by Arms
Air Date: 10/10/2015
From the creators of Senran Kagura — you know, that game that has a really complex battle system and endearing characters and is definitely not about girls punching each others’ clothes off, no sir — comes Valkyrie Drive, a ‘media franchise’ about hawt babes who kiss other hawt babes and turn into weapons to fight other hawt babes. But hey, I’m sure it has a deeply engrossing plot and an empowering portrayal of lesbianism. I mean, they clearly care so much about creating believable hawt babes characters that they even list the weight of their breasts on their character profiles. In kilograms.

11 thoughts on “GLORIO Fall 2015 Anime Guide Part 2

  1. How would you even figure that out? Closest thing I could think of is using the Archimedes principle and whatever the average weight of human tissue is and that already creeped me out that I had to think that far.

    • Assuming they were big enough, you could put one on a scale… looking at that article because I seriously had to see the WTFness for myself, that would work for two of the characters, but not the rest. Of course, considering that from that article it is incredibly obvious that the creators have never dealt with a busty woman (disproportionately large breasts still follow the rules of gravity and just don’t go two totally different ways when flopping around unsupported)…. actually, they REALLY have no clue how bra sizes work. If Miss Big Titty has an under-the-breasts measurement of 83 cm, her band size would be 85, since Japan only has band sizes in increments of 5 cm. In the US, that would be a 38 for the band size. H cup in Japan equals a F or G in the US (we are seriously not consistent on how manufacturers handle anything over DD, which massively sucks if you are well endowed and bra shopping because you can never really tell what your size is without trying every possibility on, assuming a store carries ones big enough – even online bra size calculators aren’t consistent so you can’t get a real baseline before shopping). Someone evidently came up with a formula to determine breast weight according to an article cited on Wikipedia (the article was in a legit journal), so her boobs would weigh 2.5 kg. If I could use Google to figure this out, then their stupid measurements are even more ludicrous and I surprised that the fans they are targeting haven’t called them out for their lack of accuracy, LOL. (Although I wil admit to always wondering how much mine contributed to my weight, so now I know. (shrugs))

  2. “comes Valkyrie Drive, a ‘media franchise’ about hawt babes who kiss other hawt babes and turn into weapons to fight other hawt babes.”
    comes… ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

    Well, I know what I’m watching now, you know me and my yuri, lol. One Punch Man is also kinda interesting in a meta sort of way.

  3. hmmm this part is only a little better (by no means your fault). OPM looks very intriguing and /GASP an adaptation of a real novel!!!! The Perfect Insider gets the 3 ep treatment along with garo and OPM. the rest looks shite. Pure utter shite.

    We’re a sad lot we are, considering the production houses are creating anime for us the audience. Is this the shit Japan’s anime culture is asking for? Fucking Valkyrie Drive Mermaid!?

  4. Aikawa’s track record overall is a bit better than Inoue’s, and there are others on the writing staff, so there is still a chance for Guren no Tsuki. I’m more surprised that you didn’t mention that our new Garo is an old one, since Raiga is Raikou, so YMMV depending on if you liked Makai no Hana or not. No matter what on that one, most of the rest of the cast are great (still laughing at Namikawa and Horiuchi playing son and father again in GARO), and I like Katsura’s designs as usual, so there are some other pluses that might help counteract Inoue and his misunderstandings.

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